Some women suffer from PMS, I suffer from PBS.

I don't know how to break the news to my husband that I meant to marry the writer, Shelby Foote. It was just that his gray hair, beard, and mustache threw me off. It was an easy mistake. Especially because my husband does narrate all goings-on in our household. I just wish he'd quit following me around showing me black and white photos of coal miners, soldiers, and hungry street children with distant stares. (Ok I'll quit updating my status while watching PBS). Btw PBS stands for 'plenty of black-n-white shows'.